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In Memoriam

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Spotted in the obituaries section of the World Economic Journal.

'Vergo "Corazon", 1483-1524

Vergo, 41, a Donquixote Pirate executive and Marine Vice Admiral, regrettably passed away yesterday after getting caught in a laboratory accident. Mr. Vergo had faithfully served former Shichibukai Donquixote Doflamingo for 31 years, doing everything that was required of him and attaining the first title of "Corazon". Vergo selflessly sacrificed his position as Doflamingo's right hand some years ago when he joined the Marines as a double agent. He was elemental in discovering the traitors Donquixote Rosinante and Trafalgar D. Water Law, and in his spare time modeled for the Grand Line Enquirer magazine, where he was well-known for his signature shirtless full body Haki pose. Services will be held for him at the Dressrosa Cathedral at 4 PM, after Doflamingo makes an important transaction. In lieu of flowers, please bring various foodstuffs to be stuck onto the deceased's face.

Monet, 1494-1524

In another tragic incident the same day, fellow Donquixote Pirate Monet went to be with her Lord by what doctors at the One Piece Wiki Hospital cited as heart trauma. Monet overcame many hard obstacles to find favor in the eyes of her captain, from an abusive childhood to the more recent loss of her arms and legs. But Monet never gained up, and gained wings to fly to a better future, both literally and figuratively. In the later years of her life, she was a dedicated research lab assistant to the genius scientist Caesar Clown. She is survived by her younger sister, Sugar. As her will has stated, no service will be held, and she will slowly become one with the snow. In lieu of flowers, please send Trafalgar D. Water Law's unbeating heart blueberries to her grieved sister.

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