779 Abridged
Just fun enough to make it funny.
Cover: Zoro drinks a bunny under the table and Nami overdresses.
Zoro: Hanging on a ledge with a shit-eating grin after taking out a 12 story rock giant. I could not look any more badass right now. I did just like you told me to, master.
Mihawk: Okay, you jive turkey, listen and listen good. Your sword ain't got no swagger. Your blade need to be black so it don't break. Consider your sword a failure until you make it black all the way through. Once you go black, you never go back. And if you do you gonna be the limp-blade swordsman for the rest of yo life.
Issho: Sound off if you're injured.
Marine: Everyone evacuated and we're all fine, thanks to your grasp on the GRAVITY of the situation.
Civilian: Good someon…
773 Abridged
I'm pleased to say this chapter calls for one of these.
Title: Half and Half. No, I prefer milk.
Cover: Wadatsumi Qualifies Luffy for MENSA
Bartolomeo: What the hell just happened? It looks like Cavendish, but at the same time he doesn't. He took out the horny bloodlust guy and the peons.
Gladius: Dellinger, you better not. Bitch, who said you could pass out!?
Bartolomeo: Oh, this is the thing that happened in the D block fight. This little asshole ex machina is the reason I couldn't enjoy the fight more! This bastard deprived me of entertainment in the form of carnage! Time to make some Cavendish puns.
Hakuba: Slashy Slashy!
Bartolomeo: Whoa! Dude, wear a bell or something! Ok, the joke's over. You can go back to your normal level of dickishne…
The Smiling Man, Part 5
Part 1 Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6
I was going to do something a little more fun than this (ok, a lot more fun), but with the most recent chapter, I felt this was more called for. Doflamingo has revealed more of his past and by doing so, his personality. From what I've seen, everyone is chomping at the bit to write him off as a spoiled rich kid brat. While the masses are entitled to that belief, I, however, am more hesitant to embrace that. The ego is at its most dangerous when it can be justified beyond one's own mind. In this case, we must decide if entitlement is fueling Doflamingo's ego, if Doflamingo's ego is fueling his sense of entitlement, or if the relationship is symbiotic. Before I address Doflamingo specifically, I fee…
Where Monarchs Dream, Part 5
Just when you thought it was gone, it's back! Like herpes. Or Tupac. Anyway, enjoy.
The Straw Hats are racing off to find the people on the list Cobra gave to them.
Chopper: I thought he'd be here, but I never expected I'd have to seek him out like this!
Zoro: I bet he'll be surprised. What's your nose telling you now?
Chopper: This way! He should be right around this-
Zoro: WHOA!
Zoro has to stop right away to narrowly avoid crashing into the very man they are looking for.
Guard: You got some nerve! You're lucky you didn't crash into our beloved king-
???: That's enough, Sirg. It's quite alright. He happens to be an old friend.
Sirg: Oh, I did not know that. My apologies, King-
Chopper: DALTON!
Chopper in chibi form jumps seemingly out of nowhere to…
752 Abridged
I was on the fence about making this due to it not being completely funny. Then I thought screw it, so here it is.
Cover: Jinbe is about to break new ground with the first seacat video.
Title: Makes no sense.
Doflamingo: Someone needs a key.
Luffy: Damn it! We're supposed to come to you! Go back to the palace!
Doflamingo: No really, I've come to save you. So unfortunate you thought this was a secret- ahahahhah..passage. I can't believe I got that far with a straight face. Now then, I'm hungry. Who wants burgers?
Luffy: Damn it, I'm gonna eat him! Don't hurt my cow, asshole!
Doflamingo: And here I thought this would be difficult. Seriously, how are you not dead yet? I guess my head is more popular than yours, huh? I'll be the first Shichibukai si…